I love your thoughtfulness here. Many excellent points.
This reminds me of hearing from a mother of a 6 year old. At his school, they teach the boys to hold the doors open for the girls. The young boy resents it because the girls then get to get in line first. Yay, way to teach a young boy to resent girls (who will one day be women), all in the name of “manners”. Crazy
I don’t expect anyone to hold a door open for me because I am a woman. That seems silly to me. If a man gets to the door ahead of me and stands aside and lets me go in first (let’s say it is a bank or someplace where you get in line), it feels awkward, like I have cut in front of him. Am I then supposed to let him get in line in front of me? It’s a dance I’d rather sit out.
I think it’s good manners for anyone to hold a door for someone with full arms or with a challenge like pushing a baby carriage or walker through the door. Men and women alike should hold doors open for people who could use an extra hand.
Final note, that Giuliani statement was so tone deaf. Yes sexist.
Thanks for your great work!